I’ve heard from many of you that you would like to see my books in large print format. You spoke, I listened. I am pleased to announce St. Clements Bluff is now available in large print, and I will be adding other books soon.
I also wanted to share with you the news that Three Notch Safari is DONE!
Finished. Finis. Sent it off to the editor a couple of days ago. It will be available in July.
I must tell you, that was the fastest I have ever written a book. I spent just four months on it, which is lightning speed for me. I credit my productivity to a group I’ve joined, Inkerscon Masterminds, which offers regular accountability and “the business of writing” sessions. It’s so popular there is now a waiting list to join it.
Three Notch Safari was a fun book to write and I hope you will enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
How about a quick excerpt?
As I stroked my Morgan’s chestnut-colored muzzle, I murmured to him the story of how my husband had left me for the stupidest reason in the world. John Wayne huffed his way through the story and when I finally said, “So what do I do now?” my horse shook his ebony mane and I swear he gazed at me with deep understanding and nodded as if to tell me all would be well.
Horses are like that.
Suddenly I found myself feeling very small and sorry for myself, so I buried my face against his left jowl and put my arms around his solid neck. Silent tears came in that private moment between my horse and me. The comforting odor of hay enveloped me as I clung to my big beast as if he were an equine life preserver.
I hung out with John Wayne until I heard my brother calling my name. I quickly wiped my eyes but before I could leave the stable, Bear found me. Reaching up to rub my horse’s shoulder, he said, “What’s this I hear about Mark leaving town for a private vacation? What the hell, Becca?”
I rolled my eyes. “You know mom can’t keep a story straight. However, it is true that Mark left last night.” I outlined the story for my brother as I had just done for John Wayne. I had released a lot of pain now that I had shared it with the horse, so I explained it all calmly and without emotion.
Then I waited for the explosion. It didn’t take Bear long.
“That dumb, stupid horse’s ass—sorry for the comparison, John Wayne—is one sorry excuse for a human being. You know I never liked that guy. I knew he would end up being a fool somehow, but I didn’t think he would do anything quite this moronic. I should drive to Florida right now and beat him to death with his surfboard. No, I should shove it up his—”
“Bear, stop,” I said. My brother was working himself into quite a lather. He was the most affable guy on the planet until you messed with the women in his life. Then he was scary.
Bear stood a hair over six feet tall, and he was built as solidly as his truck, Brown Betty. He was really named Edward, but his name had gotten abbreviated to Ted and then affectionately to Teddy by the time I was a young child. Donna, his wife, had nicknamed him Bear when they were dating, and it was so apropos of his size and his lovable demeanor that could turn ill-tempered when his den was threatened that we all immediately started using the name.
“I know you don’t like Mark, but you can complain about him later. I’m in some trouble here,” I said, ready to voice my deepest fears. “What am I going to do for money?”
Bear looked at me quizzically. “Go back to your contracting job on base? I’m sure they’d take you back in a second.”
I tamped down my impatience. “Really? I’m going to leave mom, as well as all of my animals, alone for eight hours or more a day for a job?”
Bear considered this. “Hire a daily caregiver for mom and a farm sitter for the animals?” he suggested.
“Really?” I repeated. “Do you know how much caregivers and farm sitters cost per hour? I’d be handing them half my paycheck.”
John Wayne huffed in agreement.
“Plus, you know how mom is. She would have a caregiver verbally beaten into a bowl of lumpy oatmeal the first day.”
“Yeah, I guess that’s true.” He removed his cap and scratched over one ear, a tell-tale sign that he was thinking furiously.
“Well, maybe Mark needs to pony up some money,” Bear said. “With all due respect,” he added, glancing at John Wayne.
I had already thought about that, too. “I assume he’s halfway to Florida by now. Within days he will be a completely broke beach waif. How am I going to get money from him? It would be like squeezing blood out of a turnip, as they say. “Want to help me with the llamas?”
I gave John Wayne a final pat. “I’ll be back later to muck you guys,” I said to him, walking over to Annie Oakley’s stall and stroking her jowl. “I mean you, too, lady.”
I stopped at three other small stalls, saying good bye and promising to return soon to each of my miniature horses, Randy, Reba, and Kenny.
Bear followed me out to the feed shed where I filled a pail with llama treats. I handed it to Bear so he could offer the treats up to them. He loved the llamas. Everyone loves the llamas.
At their fenced enclosure, Cuddlebug, Doodlebug, and Ladybug came running to greet me. Okay, they came sauntering to greet me.
I must admit, Cuddlebug is my favorite of all my animals. Next to John Wayne, of course.
“Kisses,” I said to Cuddlebug, who pressed his nose against mine and blew hot breath through his nostrils at me for several moments.
“Maybe you could sell the llamas’ fur,” Bear suggested as I continued to nuzzle Cuddlebug.
“It’s not fur, it’s hair,” I said, pulling back from the llama so that Bear could pull treats from the pail and hold them out individually to the llamas. They were usually polite to one another and waited to be offered treats in turn, but on some days, Ladybug would decide she was Queen Llama and try to bully her way in to get them all.
I was relieved that today she was on her best behavior.
“Whatever,” Bear said. “Don’t they use the stuff to make high-end sweaters?”
I shook my head. “No, alpacas have the premium hair for sweaters and blankets. Llama hair is a lesser product. If I could get $5 a pound for llama hair, I’d be lucky. And a pound of llama hair is a mountain of it.”
Bear frowned as he handed out the last treat to Doodlebug. “Then that won’t work unless you have a thousand llamas.”
“And I’m not going to have a thousand llamas.”
I noticed something protruding from Doodlebug’s jaw. “Not again with you,” I said, moving to where he stood, gazing at me with his perpetually goofy look. Poor Doodlebug had a deformity that caused him to have a buck-toothed underbite. It didn’t impact his life much except that all kinds of stuff seemed to get lodged in his mouth.
I gently cupped his jaw and pulled out a clump of straw mixed with dirt. I dropped the clump to the ground and told the llama, “You’ve got to be a little neater, my man. You’re going to get an infection.”
Doodlebug was forever getting infections, which meant expensive vet visits. Was I going to have to give him up? Was I going to have to give up everything?
I turned to say something to Bear, but he was standing there staring at me with a devilish grin. “What is wrong with you?” I said.
“I, the best brother in the world, have just come up with the best idea in the world. You are going to be the number one attraction in St. Mary’s County. You are going to make lots of money and, of course, you will remember your brother when that happens.”
Bear explained the idea. I wasn’t sure if he was brilliant or certifiably insane.
As a reminder, you can find my books at all the usual online locations plus numerous locations in Maryland. Click here to Shop Local and view a local bookstore locations list.
Don’t forget to visit the Appearances page for a complete listing of my upcoming book-signings and events. It would be a treat to meet you and say “hello.”